A New Type of Opening Day in 2011

Today started off bright an early in a high school gym surrounded by hundreds of uniform clad kids.

Their bright colors were accented with props and banners each being waved in the air as they circled the interior of our crowd.  

Though the rain kept us inside, our spirits were high as this was the start to our Baseball season!

And what a season it has turned out to be.  

Our first year being responsible for the organization of a team...which, with Jarrod being out of town almost every week, has proved to fall quite a bit in my court. 

Not that I mind.....I do Major in the Bossiness Business....but I know NOTHING about actually making better players out of these little guys!  Pay that no mind, we've been blessed with two other coaches that have MORE than pulled their weight.

But enough about us......all my joy lies in our little players.

Which Natalia and I decided to support with our fashion sense.

As I was saying.....This year has provided so many milestones already:

1) Ian moving up a division and being on a separate team from his brother

2) Jarrod managing a team as I already stated

3) Jarrod voted onto the Board for this League

4) Merrick walking

Oh yeah, that's no minor detail.

During today's parade, I remembered how last year we cajoled Merrick into participating.  He was barely 3 months post-op, and mostly hobbling with the help of a walker.

He couldn't support his weight alone.

In fact, here is a blurb I wrote a month prior to Opening Day 2010:

Merrick shuffle/walked for most of today.  I dared myself not to get over excited.  But with each halting step he proved his bravery.  Tomorrow we go back to Physical Therapy to check out his 'form.'  It's no longer an IF he will walk again....it has progressed to a WHEN will  he walk smoothly again, and how can I help him?  From here improvements may be slow and laborious...Six more weeks the Dr. said, and of those two weeks need to be low stress...so no running.   

So last year, as we approached that huge high school track he acted like we were going to torture him,

Check out his sad face:

Go ahead, be sad with him.  I know I was.  But we had to keep setting up goals for him to achieve!

For challenging him I will never apologize.  I'll cry with him when it hurts.  But I won't back down

  (God balances us out though, Jarrod eventually pushed him part of the way around that track

 since the walker had wheels on it ;)

As for this year,

It's a night and day difference.

He is ready to go. In fact, he is far more excited about playing than Ian is this year. 

Which might be hard to believe:

Speaking of Ian, he missed out on today's festivities due to a sore throat.

He really tried to push through it this morning, even waking up and dressing in his uniform.

But then the thought of walking around in the parade exhausted him.

So I promised to take pictures of his team while he rested with Marmar.

Go River Bandits!

(Talia and I have black and white bandanas to match their theme.  Eeeee, how I love themes!

More on those at his first game :)

As a whole, Opening Day provided a celebration of strength and joy.

How could we not praise the Creator of such magnificent bodies? 

Bodies which are able to mend and grow and change virtually overnight? 

I'll give him three cheers....and add a few more for good measure!

Wanna join me?

Now let's do the WAVE~~~~~~~

It's going to be a great year in baseball folks.

YAY God!

Reservoir Reservations....

Today we had a moment where I doubted myself.

How much can you ask of your child when you're not able to do the same thing?

It was time for our Monday hike and off we drove to Lafayette Reservoir.

We met up with our hiking crew, chock full of experienced hikers all decked out with hydration packs and outdoorsy clothes. (Don't feel bad if you're lost, I had never even heard of

a hydration pack until last week ;)

Normally our group breaks into two hiking crews.....The Littles and the Bigs.

The Littles generally consist of the kids who are 4 and under, accompanied by their respective mommas.

The Big kid hike includes the rest of the group...those adults with the most hiking experience, as well as atleast 23 kids, ages 5 & up.  The group mostly consists of boys ages 6-12 who explore nature with gusto...as well as cheer each other on.

This marked the occasion of our second hike for the year. 

Last week, we lucked out and Jarrod was able to come along as he was working from home.

I was so thankful that he could 'break in' the boys and accompany them on the Big hike.

They ended up taking a 4 mile hike with about a 100 hundred foot climb.

That week the Littles took a perfectly leisurely 2 mile hike closer to the ground level.  Just my style...and perfect for breaking in Natalia (and me of course!)

This week we had the option to stay on a paved course that followed the edge of the Reservoir.

It's a path I'm very familiar with as I used to walk it a lot when the kids were small.  I haven't attempted it since Natalia has been able to walk.  It was great to go with a baby in a stroller, but not so much with an active toddler.  The paved path has a few big hills, but it's a steady, predictable walk. 

The Bigs were going off the pavement and up onto 'The Rim.'

I had no idea what to expect on their hike, but I knew that Natalia wouldn't last on a 5 mile trek.

She was however, having a terrible time splitting from 2 of her friends who are older than she is.....perfect motivation to try out the Big hike.

I say try out because I wasn't sure I could even do the 5 mile hike!

The 74 degree weather we were expecting was much closer to the low 80s...and I had foolishly only packed one water bottle for each of us.

A dear friend of mine and I decided it was worth the shot to set out with the Big hike and to plan on turning back if it got too hard.

Um, can I say that it started OUT hard?

Uphill from the beginning and completely exposed, much like the path here.....with a few more trees off to the side.  Natalia was a mess....crying about 15 minutes in....

and MAN, it is quite hard to motivate a little person when you're not feeling motivated yourself. 

I think I asked my friend if we could turn back atleast 3 times.......she kept telling me how funny I was.....I kept trying to stress that I was dying, NOT a laughing matter in my book!

We ended up finding a turn off that would lead down to the original paved road....after our 1 mile uphill detour....we were now set to finish our 2 mile walk around the reservoir.

My boys however were in for more adventure.

They were headed for the top of the rim...in the next photo, picture us down by the water....and they would be on the trail hidden way up in the top of the hills.....and it went UP and down, and UP and down for the entire time.

I will say that the boys seemed to do much better without me there, since Jarrod said they NEVER complained on the last hike, and this time they were all over me asking me to stop, or turn back, etc.  (and I was only with them for the FIRST mile!) 

The momma bear in me wondered if I had sent my baby boy to be tortured, not by the hiking leads, but by the terrible hills.  Since I knew I didn't have the endurance to climb more than a mile of those hills, how did I expect my 6 year old, only 9 months after his surgery to do so??

I prayed, and wondered, and prayed some more....hoping Merrick wasn't up there dragging or complaining, or just plain needing me.  Sweet Ian is a firstborn, I don't worry about him as much, I know he'll muddle through and complain later ;)

Eventually, I called one of the leaders to see how they were doing and they ended up meeting up with us at the park only an hour and a half or so after our own hike ended.

They made great time. 

And the leaders didn't hear a peep out of my boys. 

I was SO grateful, and I couldn't wait to see them.

Ian approached me first and told me about the shortcut that tacked on an additional mile to their trek. 

Merrick stopped off at a bathroom so I waited a bit longer to see him.

Even from 50 yards away I could see him trying to compose himself, his face twisting up as he bit his lip.

I thought, "Oh man, all did not go as easily as he had lead on." 

He burst into tears when he saw me.

It broke my heart.  He sobbed about how much he was hurting and how hard the hike had been, etc, etc.

I rubbed his fuzzy head and told him how proud I was....all the while fighting back my own tears.

I hadn't mentioned his ordeal to anyone yet because I didn't want him to have to 'wear' that as a sign, or to feel like he had an out to give up too easy.

But as tough as I may seem I melted with him as he let loose in my arms.  He was a bone-weary, boy with an achy leg.  Even after so many months he has so much more to go through to fully recover. 

Please pray with me that we know how hard to push him.  

We've talked so much about needing to 'break down' muscle in order to build them back stronger.  But it's not an easy process. 

And the Mommy Factor (you know the thing that made him burst into tears on seeing me...) gets in the way.

I have to be tough enough to help him, yet gentle enough to be able to comfort him when he needs it.

Today I let him cry and I told him we'll take each hike as it comes.

Most of them won't have those kinds of hills.

I don't want him to think it's ok to go on the Little's hike because he's scared.   

Isn't that a lesson for us all?

I may have reservations about my own abilities, but with someone who believes in me.......anything can be possible.

God heal us all from our disbelief!

and

may I be a backbone for them when they need to see Your strength, Lord.

Before the Morning

The other day, I met with a sweet, sweet momma of two boys.  Her oldest son was just diagnosed with an Osteoid Osteoma in his left femur.  I still can't believe the similarities between our stories.   Her son is 5, just going to turn 6 yrs old, as was Merrick at the time of his surgery.  His tumor is also in his leg...though the opposite leg than Merrick.  The Dr. guiding their recovery is the same Orthopaedic Specialist.  She is as worried about the MRI as I was.  Watching her hurt, broke my heart.  Talking to her brought back so much of the pain and uncertainty that we went through during the diagnosis process.

Thankfully, her son's tumor is also benign.....and it is also not constantly painful as Merrick's had become.  The location is different, being on the outside of his bone rather than directly inside as Merrick's was....
I really just can't understand why two boys in the same geographical area would have the same type of tumor, at the same age.  Of course it makes you think the problem could be environmental....and then I stop and go....Oh yeah, all of that aside, it points me back to God.

His plans are unfathomable and purposeful.  Even the ones that are meant for evil.  The plans that the enemy thinks will cause us to doubt and to falter.  Those are the plans that are meant for HIS glory.
I hold onto that.  Some would say that this is a crutch.  But if you know Sacrifice.  If you've SEEN firsthand, the daily mercy that is poured over a sorrowful, overwhelmed heart.  
Then you can't deny Love.

We were saved to nurture this baby back to health and to be there through his pain.  We were never meant to be able to take it away from him, as much as we might have prayed that.  The plan for Merrick's life was set out before time began.  And it is a glorious plan.  I rest in that.   I know the same is true for this little boy and his family.

You know how I am about song lyrics.
This one reminded me of this dear friend.
My heart aches with her. 
And while I tear us, I hold out for the Glory of it all.

God has never stopped working in her son's life.
Will you pray with me for little Ryan?  He has a tough road ahead of him.  If his parents choose surgery, it will mean the same bodycast/recovery period as we've gone through.  It's not something that can be rushed.  But as we all know, it IS a process with hope.
I finally think we can see the 'other side' of Merrick's ordeal.  He was still raring to go after a two days in a row of hiking. 

God please give this dear friend a glimpse of that horizon to get her through today:

Before the Morning
by Josh WilsonDo you wonder why you have to
Feel the things that hurt you
If there’s a God who loves you where is He now

Maybe there are things you can’t see
And all those things are happening
To bring a better ending

Someday somehow you’ll see you’ll see
Would you dare would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing

Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
It can’t compare to the joy that’s coming

So hold on you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight

Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling
It’s just the dark before the morning


My friend you know how this all ends
You know where you’re going
You just don’t know how you’ll get there
So say a prayer

And hold on cause there’s good for those who love God
But life is not a snapshot
It might take a little time but you’ll see the bigger picture

Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory

It’s just the hurt before the healing
Oh the pain that you’ve been feeling
It’s just the dark before the morning

BTW- the story behind this song is amazing:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1ZQKzzyaJI

That's a wrap folks!

2010 is halfway over! Can you believe it?

Friday night was our Open House/Graduation for our Science/History/Art Co-op.

The kids had such an amazing time showing off their work and performing for their family. 

As their teacher, and mostly as their momma it was wonderful to see at a glance just how much they really learned during this hectic year!

I'll feature much more about that evening on our family blog, but here is one of my favorite pieces.

A lapbook about George Washington and Abraham Lincoln.

Merrick and Ian made their 'Washington French'...see the mustache.  "Wee wee,"  they'll say if you ask them about it.  It's hilarious!

As I was saying though....

We've wrapped up the school year and have begun planning for next year.

This week is also the last week of baseball for the boys.

I snapped this shot at today's game.

I love the angle of Merrick tapping the base as he readies to hit Ian home (from 3rd base.)

There he goes! What great teamwork! 

And just think, this moment was NOT doctor recommended!

Remember this guy....we signed him up for baseball against the orders of his doctor ....well atleast with the knowledge that he may not be able to run just 6 weeks after surgery. 

Well this was him at one of his first baseball practices.  He hobbled with the aid of a walker, and he tired very easily.  He didn't even bother trying to hit the ball since he didn't have the balance to stand unassissted.

And just look at him now....

That's the way you score a run baby!

And that would be the game ball!

Those events were spread out over this season.

A successful season if you ask me!

So I sit here tonight So grateful for our kid's health.

For Merrick's recovery, and for the grace of God that allowed our kids to learn SO much even as we worked our way through a tumor diagnosis, major surgery, recovery, and then moving out of our house.

It's been quite a ride to say the least!

And like I said, 2010 is only HALF way done ;)

To the other half I say....bring it!

The Tooth Fairy

In our house, the tooth fairy is a subject/ non-subject.

One half of me doesn't want to 'kill' all the fantasy in my kid's lives.  I still want Disneyland to be magical and for there to be some wonderment in their eyes when they see slight of hand.  But I also do not want them to think that the God we speak of as being real and magnificent and omnipresent, yet unseen.....is the same as that fat guy in the red suit at Christmas time.

We want our words to carry meaning. 

So when you ask me, in front of my kids, if the Easter Bunny is real.....you're probably gonna get a "what do YOU think?" kind of answer.

Ask my kids if Santa is real and they'll tell you that he was a man, Nicholas, who lived very long ago and he inspired others to be giving when he filled the stockings of poor children who had hung them out to dry.

But they'll tell you he's dead now.....they'll say it almost comically.

Also, they also know that at Easter and Christmas they receive treats in the form of baskets and overflowing stockings.

So they will ask me if I'm the one filling the stockings at home and I'll say yes....why would I give the credit to a non-living being at this point?  BUT if they want to know about the stockings filled at Marmar's house...that is completely up to HER to explain.   She will have to answer to them for causing any mistrust in their childhood ;)  I don't mess with the Marmar! (Even I like having a filled stocking still!)

So.....what about the Tooth Fairy? 

Ian, being our firstborn, helped establish the ground rules.  It's a bit of a 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' policy.  I say, "If you LIKE receiving money for your teeth, then DON'T ASK!"

But really, because I keep them guessing, they still wonder.  And I LOVE it.

I remember questioning when I was their age....until I found ALL my baby teeh in my mom's jewlry box! Yuck!  Talk about a shocker!

So I told Ian that if there was a Tooth Fairy I'd make her a deal to leave the tooth behind so that we could save it, if we wanted to.  She could leave the money AND the tooth.  He was ALL GOOD with THAT deal!

Well, wouldn't you know that Ian lost his first tooth on a night where I had NO change in my wallet.  Nothing, save a $5 bill.   So we cringed and left it in his 'tooth' pillow....the one that Marmar made of course!

And then next day I told Ian that he probably only got that much because it was his VERY first tooth and not to expect that much with the next ones ;)

Well, Merrick being a whole 18 months younger just remembers that Ian received a LOT of money from that tooth!

 So he likes to tell the story, that Ian received $20 for tooth...and all that Merrick has ever received is $2 or $3 per tooth.  Poor, porr Merrick, he can be SO persuasive!

Well, he's been working on a doozy for over a month now.  And it was all I could to to get my hands around that crooked little piece of enamel and tug real hard! 

But he wouldn't let us near it until last night when he let me tie a piece of dental floss around it, and as I pulled tight on the knot, that tooth POPPED right out!

Well, being under Marmar and Papi's roof can be a bit tricky.  I've had to let go of some things....maybe even begrudgingly.....but last night was hilarious!

We all rejoiced as Merrick's tooth finally came out.  Then the next thing I know, Marmar is shoving a $20 bill into my hands to put under his pillow.  "Um, Nooooo,"  I kept saying...that is NOT a precedent I want to start.  But she insisted that we had done this for Ian and Merrick wouldn't stop talking about getting $20 for one tooth.  So she HAD to do this, just this once she said!

Knowing I could not win in this situation.....I went ahead with the 'exchange'

Wouldn't you know that I snuck that huge bill under his pillow when I gave him a goodnight kiss (felt super sly about that one!)  and when he woke up in the morning he asked Marmar if it was a $50 bill!

Um, yeah, so much for THAT theory Marmar....the kid doesn't know the difference between a $20 or a $50 bill!  AND he would've been fine with our measly 3 dollar bills!

I told Marmar she can finance Talia's $20 tooth!   OR atleast make Merrick stop talking about this strange occurance.  

(thankfully Ian hasn't negotiated a 'raise' yet!)

Merrick now knows that his tooth fairy was probably new on the job ;)

The boys will tease me about being the tooth fairy and we just laugh and send them on their way!  So here's to toothless grins and $20 gaffes!

Let's Here It For The Boy!

When you have kids you find yourself swelling with pride...and often.

Little things can set me off on a proud moment.  Watching my 3 yr. old wash her hands without being asked.  Witnessing a moment of sweetness between siblings.  Hearing our oldest read to his siblings.  It doesn't take much  really.......but then a MAJOR hurdle presents itself and you realize that the little one you nursed in your arms just 5 short years ago....he is able to climb MOUNTAINS!

Inspite of having our Physical Therapy appointment cancelled yesterday.....(our PT guy called an hour before our appointment to say that he was booking up for the day...and he'd see us on Wednesday.

I might have growled at him....just a little)

Merrick is walking around like crazy.

All he really needed was the permission to try it out.  So we prodded a bit and now we're praying for him to slow down!  It's tough to keep a newly-mobile 6 year old from straining anything!

Especially when Tuesday's xrays looked great!

This is the side view.....you can see the spot where a tumor used to be....now it looks like a paper cut in the bone.  Just a small little slice left to represent the hours of pain, the bushels of worry, and the upheaval of our lives.

The back view shows a bit more damage.

You can see where the bone had a nice chunk removed....it's indented a bit on the left side.

Because the healing bone represents the same in an xray as the tumor did, there is no way to know that it is all gone.  Well, except that our boy is no longer in pain.  Which is the best news of all.

The best thing is we won't be going back to THIS anytime soon:

Especially since this is what he looked like for most of Sunday.  Determined to 'run' with his friends.  You can see the concentration on his face as he hobbles.  Shuffle, shuffle, swing that leg.....

But he did it....and he slept like a baby that night.

By the grace of God we have heard the last of 'tumors'....and

we look forward to many more of these:

Cheers to our brave, strong boy.

Let's take it one step at a time!

Silver Lining

“God left the world unfinished for man to work his skill upon. He left the electricity still in the cloud, the oil still in the earth.

How often we look upon God as our last and feeblest resource!

We go to Him because we have nowhere else to go. And then we learn that the storms of life have driven us, not upon the rocks, but into the desired haven.”

I read this and thought...it's not that our cloud has a silver lining......

The lining was never the point.

This storm was a means to an end.  The process was important...it was shaping and molding us, testing us at every turn!

The point was to trust in and rely on our Creator.  Not an unjust God who is blind to our plight.  But a compassionate, loving Savior who knew before we breathed our very first breathe, that this too was needful.  It was time to return to our haven.

I can only speak for myself, but I had missed the point for so long.  I had stopped talking to God as a friend, and more as a genie.  I pleaded and demanded from God.....I came to Him often as a tyrant or an unfair boss. 

As the waves of the storm continued I remembered my purpose.   I may be commanding this ship, but I have never been the captain.  These kids were counting on me for direction and to follow my example.  Would I complain our way through this ordeal, or rejoice with every new step? 

I think you know my choice.   And now I'm here to say that the end is in sight.

The shadow of those clous had obscured my view.  But then we saw it......

“A cloud cannot cast a shadow unless the sun is shining beyond it”

Merrick shuffle/walked for most of today.  I dared myself not to get over excited.  But with each halting step he proved his bravery.  Tomorrow we go back to Physical Therapy to check out his 'form.'  It's no longer an IF he will walk again....it has progressed to a WHEN will  he walk smoothly again, and how can I help him?  From here improvements may be slow and laborious...Six more weeks the Dr. said, and of those two weeks need to be low stress...so no running.   

So as the sunlight warms my face with hope, my discouragement is waning.   I won't deny that complaining is still my forte.  But with so much to be thankful for....we must stay focused on the light behind the clouds.

Baby Steps

Well folks, we're back from our Orthopaedic check-up.
And yes, I realize that was two full days ago, but I just couldn't stomach writing about it until now.

Let me back up and say......I think I tend to err on the side of sunshine....or atleast glasses three-quarters full.....but Tuesday was bad. 
I was frustrated and angry and not afraid to admit it.

As my dear friend reminded me, it's ok to tell God when you're not happy about something.
He knows life is not all rainbows and warm-fuzzies.  So I did.........me and God had 'words.'
And I shed lots of tears.
I'm tired and my son is more tired.  And it's all so unfair.
(And if you're tired of reading about our pity parties...feel free to click here and read about happier times.)

But the reality of the situation is that we will never reach the end of a timeframe where Merrick is magically back to 'normal.'
At no point should I have expected him to put down that foot and take a step.
Maybe I didn't ask enough questions about this surgery, but now we know.  This ordeal is far from over.

We traded one type of gnawing, inexplicable pain, for another.  An avoidable, uncomfortable straining pain.
And it's this new pain that has become a reality for him.
He now knows how to cope with this new pain.
He hobbles/crawls/scoots or uses the walker around our house....and in public he is frustrated by the slowness of his walker, so he begs to be pushed.   Merrick would much rather hop in his wheelchair than spend all day hopping on one leg and steering around his walker.  Wouldn't you? 
Someone asked me about the walker the other day...as I struggled to unload a wheelchair and 5 kids in the rain.....yeah, well, I'll force him to do many things, but that darn walker really does look torurous.  So I get all motherly, and compassionate, and let him take the break.

What I thought would be a blessing to him is too much of a workout.  He has spent the last 6 weeks tenderly nursing this bum leg, and now we expect him to use it again?
Pshaw!  No way, it hurts mom!

Compounding our issue on the way to our Dr. appt he tripped and hurt the top of his foot.
He was using his walker and dropped his 'bad' leg too close to the ground.  I wasn't nearby, but he says he fell onto the top of his foot.  His screams of pain and loads of tears told me it was more than just a stubbed toe.  So I mentioned it to the Dr. during our visit.  I was concerned to have him put weight on it if there was a sprain or even a hairline fracture.  But my concern was pooh-poohed.  And my request for an x-ray deemed unnecessary.  I was told to return in 3-4 days if it still hurt.
Bah!  Can you see where my anger began?  The Momma Bear in me was ready to roar!  You want me to take home a hurting son for half a week when we're here NOW? 

Next, the Dr. explained that he expects much limping, and only gradual weight bearing at first........No rough play for 2 more weeks, and then a total of 6 more weeks of physical therapy before he hopes to see Merrick walking around again.  Um, I'm sorry, at what point did I miss the synopsis of this 12 week process?  When we talked about surgery I was only given info bit by bit.  There is much to be said about asking as many questions as possible, but at that time I only had his casttime recovery in mind.
This trickle of information was obviously meant to keep us limitedly informed so we wouldn't be overwhelmed.  But MAN!  Talk about a shock!

So now the work begins.  I keep praying over his foot and we don't see any bruising or swelling- so the likelyhood of it being broken is slim.  I just wish I knew how hard I should push him.  Both Jarrod and I are so eager to see him walk again, that we talk him through each motion, distract him from the pain of a step, and cheer him for every milestone.  But we're all so tired.  And if he really didn't break anything then his tears are just indicative of how hard we will have to fight for each step. 

Physical therapy is no joke.  This continues to be a long hard journey for Merrick, my softy, sensitive, uber dramatic, and hater of all things uncomfortable middle child. 
Keep praying the miracles our way.  I know they are coming, but they sure are taking their time!

Misty watercolored miracles

It's so easy to get caught up in survival mode, no?
Breakfast, clean up breakfast, school/library/errands, Lunch, playtime/school, prep dinner, Dinner, clean-up, laundry/chores/bedtime/school prep/blog, sleep. 
Lather, rinse, repeat!

That schedule almost makes a dent in a possible day's filling.......and I didn't even add in the kid's activities/classes/appointments, etc.

So life in general is busy enough that a week can slip away all too quickly.  Next thing you know, you're enjoying Daddy time on the weekends and getting ready to start all over again. 
It's like washing the dishes....didn't I JUST load/unload this thing?
Whew!

So I'm jumping off that crazy train for just a second to update you.  And may I add, thank you to those of you who hound me to put up these updates.  I need the reminders ;)

Through the downpour of busyness, we've seen miracles appear and vanish as quickly as a rainbow.  The wonder lasts for those moments, but if I share it with you, the happy thoughts can linger a little longer right?

For instance,  Merrick finally received his Junior Walker.  This little piece of aluminum has granted him simultaneous independence and exhaustion.  Walking with it is similar to walking with a pair of crutches...only with more stability....and without the aching armpits.  I'll detail on our family blog, how perfect the timing of it's delivery was.  Suffice it to say....this small piece of equipment is such a blessing for our son!
Sometimes we forget how limited he is right now.  I actually pause at the email inviting us on a hike.....wait are we free?  Oh, that's right, hiking is not really our thing right now!   But having a walker he can use...frees him up from banging around in a wheelchair, or needing someone to manuever him around corners.  Ah, freedom, a bright and shining arch!

Secondly, I may have mentioned our bill pile....steadily growing since December.  The medical bills which will total in the thousands.....and for which we had no other recourse than to begin paying with credit cards.  Those medical bills just sat there....staring at us.   Then tonight we finally got around to filing our taxes.  Wouldn't you know that we will receive MORE than enough to pay off those bills when all is said and done.  And poof! Another rainbow appeared, a promise of provision and a substitute to carry our load.
That promise was always there.....we didn't NEED the tax return to know it....but our precious Savior is so merciful.  He knew our meager faith could only take so much, so He provided this sign...to remind us we were never alone.  He has never left us....even when things look bleak.  He has given us a spectrum of hope.

So now as we're in our final week of non-weight bearing therapy/hobbling.....I'm waiting expectantly for the next light show.  It will have been over 6 weeks since Merrick tried walking.  I'm believing on the miracle of his muscles to strengthen and his body to remember how to balance.  For all of the exercises we've done with his legs....and for all the ones we have forgotten to do.  That the scar tissue that goes through such thick muscle has been massaged enough to remain flexible for it's graduation to walking.  It's not a rainbow I hope will be there.   At this point it's a miracle I KNOW we will see.

And that my friends, is what we've been up to....just sky watching a bit, and waiting.

A Quick Merrick Update

I seriously haven't had an ounce of 'extra' energy to post here.

But Merrick....he on the other hand is FULL of energy ;)

So we're at 8 days sans body cast...and things are looking pretty good.

Two days later we visited the physical therapist...

and he and Merrick hit it off! 

It helped that they have the same birthday....

AND the first day was super easy since Merrick still cannot put weight on his leg.

On the other hand, The PT guy...we'll call him Sam, told me that he HAS to start exercising because the muscles...in both legs are showing atrophy. 

And if you know me by now....all I need is a little permission!

Let's get this boy moving! Just tell us what NOT to do :D

So Merrick came home with arm strengthening exercises and instructions to do slow leg lifts everyday.  He has been so faithful to do it.....grimacing all the way.

He basically cannot lift his leg completely straight....sweet boy.  If  it's not one thing it's another!

In the meantime, we've kept busy...jumping back into our routine....and swapping his GINORMO wheelchair for one my mom uses after her knee surgeries.

(Poor guy....we should probably remove that purple bag from the back!)

So on Monday we ventured to Fenton's Creamery in Oakland...and then ended up at this beautiful Regional park aftewards.  While most of the boys were wandering the hills exploring....we busied ourselves at the park.  Then I decided to take Merrick for 'a walk...'

First we crossed this bridge...it was MUCH safer than it looks...but I loved how we tottered on the edge...so we stopped to take pictures.  I promise it was over a very small trickle of water!

Then we came up to the hill that the other boys had climbed. 

I popped Merrick on my back and up we went....

I made it pretty far right?  See where we parked the wheelchair?

....but as we looked up the surprisingly steep hill.  Well let's just say the revelation of my natural clumsiness struck me.....and Merrick and I shared a nervous giggle as we decided to head back down to safety.

We'll leave the climbing to the rest of you monkeys!

So now we wait......Merrick has a junior walker that should be delivered in the next few days.  And then we'll keep the wheelchair for long trips only.  Merrick has figured out how to hobble around pretty confidently......So I find myself walking through the day mentally taking note of which leg is his injured leg.  Right...oh, yeah, his right leg. 

His skin is completely recovered from it's time in the cast....and he treats his leg gingerly....but he's fought back for a lot of his independence.  He even climbed this ladder on one leg while we were at the park!

So there you have it.....

check in with our family blog for more details. 

But we are alive and kicking....literally!

And I'm praising God that Merrick still has two legs...even if one is weaker than the other for now. 

Please join us in praying for a full recovery...and strength for him to get a little baseball time in this season!

The Cast-Off: a fact sheet

Fact:  We visited the Orthopaedic Specialist today.

Fact:  We went in smiling.

Fact:  This was only 25 days after surgery.

Fact:  It takes 6-8 weeks for a broken bone to heal.

Fact:  It takes less than 5 minutes to remove a single spica cast with a saw and a pair of scissors.

Fact:  That part didn't hurt.

But it was all downhill from there.

Fact:  Neither one of us was prepared for the stiffness in his joints, the pain at the site of the incision, the muscle soreness, the renewed lack of mobility or the mandate to keep him off his leg for another 3 weeks.

Fact:  The cast went away, but so did our smiles.

Fact:  Just when you think you've got it all figured out,

a trial will come to test your resolve.....and force you to admit on WHOM you are relying.

Fact:  I had started to rely on my own strength again.

Fact:  We needed another talk about the power of prayer and the temporal state of our worries.

In light of eternity, and the relative size of the troubles of others.....

3 more weeks of wheelchairs and lifting with our knees is a drop in the bucket of a much grander scheme.

Fact:  Today was no surprise to God. 

He knew the number of our tears before we even knew we'd be sad.

Fact: We have much to be thankful for.

Fact:  By bedtime we were smiling again.